Holy Farkle. It has been 5 months since my last Journal Entry. I guess I should say what has been happening.

Well... A few weeks after New Years, I found out my Best Friend and I had feelings for each other. I just met him at the beginning of this school year, and we we so close I could go to him for anything and I knew he'd always be there for me. I never complain, so that never happened. So we dated for a while... happiest WEEK of my life. Some bitch broke us up... the sad thing was, she was one of my friends who liked him!

She must have said something because he told her "I love Jordan... I want to stay with Jordan." Then suddenly overnight he just doesn't like me anymore. I loved him and I always will... but I guess we weren't meant to be? He was my first boyfriend too. I never thought I could fall so hard for someone. My first kiss, date, everything. I still have my virginity. Keeping that 'till marriage.

Now it's been 5 months and he will not talk to me. What used to be:

*Walking the hallway*
Him: JORDAN!
Me: JEFF!

*BFF HUG*

Now turned into:

*Hallway*

Me: ...
Him: *eyes go down* :/

It's like he's lost all interest in me. As if he wants nothing to do with me at all anymore. He's completely changed... He's trying to be a hippie, and he wants his sisters fiance (who he HATES.) to give him a pound of weed for him to sell. I don't even know who he is anymore. I lost my best friend, I lost my lover, I lost all this in a matter of 24 hours. And I lost him to drugs and a girl I thought was my friend. I want my Jeff-Jeff back... but I know I never will. Not as a friend, no nothing. I never get hugs from him, even a smile would mean the world.

That's the highlight of this shitty year so far. What Else... Oh yeah, I have a job now because I drive. I HATE IT. I have SO many after school drama commitments and I can't balance it out! I just missed the last improv show of the year and we have so many seniors leaving. I won't see them for a long time. And I grew so close to them too. Isn't the last half to Jr. Year just fascinating?

Um... Yeah let's skip PAST all that and get on a lighter note.

YEAH! Advanced Drama and Choir for my Senior Year! I've grown so much in my 9 years of Drama and Music and I can't wait to start!! Hopefully my Boss won't schedule me all week due to these commitments and Senior Year.

That's probably the only highlight of my year.

Finals next week!! FUN... not.

--- OH BETCHMOFO! I FORGOT MY MATH BOOK IN MY LOCKER ._.

Craaaap. I have a Study Guide to cram into final studying!! as;dlf;as!!! Okay I'll blow it off until to tomorrow. Grah!! SO STRESSFUL.

AND I have to finish choreographing a dance for my Dance Final at school by Friday! We only have like nine 8 counts. Stresssss!!!

I'm gonna go before I break something out of this stress x__x

~ Jordan